Five Years in LA

I celebrate my move to Los Angeles on January 10th. Which makes today my 5-year Los Angeles anniversary.

It wasn't the first time I moved to Los Angeles (I came the previous September with the intention of staying... but it didn't work out). And I've left the city for months at a time since then, so it wasn't the most permanent of moves. I'll always be a little bi-coastal, a little transient, no matter where I am.

I came to Los Angeles for the wrong reasons. I came here for an abusive ex-boyfriend whom I was convinced I was going to marry (thank God I didn't). I came for a non-guaranteed seasonal job with long hours and very little stability. I came because I didn't know what else to do.

I've stayed for better reasons than I arrived. Because of the community I've found. Because of the art I've been able to create. Because I can feel like a person here, while also pursuing my career aspirations. Because I can be in a city and the suburbs at the same time. Because I feel unlimited in what I can accomplish. And hey, the weather is a nice bonus.

I went to the east coast for four months last year (in fact, I was gone for what would've been my 4-year anniversary). Since returning in March, Los Angeles has given me so many things that I'd asked for. A job that makes me feel joy. My dream role in a play, which reminded me that there's a reason I keep fighting. A boyfriend who loves me (and also seems to like me), who supports me in my goals even when they take me away from him for months at a time.

In these 5 years, I've been in 9 productions of plays/musicals, produced 1 play, worked with 10 theatre companies, made it to the quarter-finals of a playwriting competition, acted in over 20 staged readings and workshops, founded 1 theatre company, had a co-star role on a television show, been in 7 student films, acted in an award-winning web series, acted in a film that screened at Comic Con and Newport Beach Film Festival, been nominated for a Best Actress award, trained at 3 improv schools and 3 acting schools, joined a sketch comedy troupe, joined 2 unions (bringing the total to 3), spent 3 years volunteering with a playwrights lab to help develop new works, modeled for more than 20 photographers and 1 painter, tutored Shakespeare students, taught a class on social media marketing for actors, lived in 3 apartments (and on my friend Ann's couch), and had 12 day-jobs (not including being the Literary Manager of a theatre).

I've tried to fill my life with adventures. I've had my photograph in Rolling Stone. I've taken trains around the country. I've been to many dance parties at 6am. I've sung in karaoke competitions. I've become a female drag queen. I've assisted a magician at the Magic Castle. I've proudly worked behind the scenes on a tv show doing off-camera dialogue, being a scene partner to people I admire. I've acquired over 60 wigs. I've visited 4 foreign countries. I've written hundreds of thousands of words for National Novel Writing Month. I've documented years of my life, one second at a time. I was on a panel at Comic Con. I've mentored younger actors. I've composed poetry on a typewriter. I've gotten myself into therapy, and then back out of it again (I'm equally proud of both). I've looked like an idiot in front of more celebrities than I'd like to admit (at least 4 of whom hugged me after the fact).

Five years in, I don't have an agent, but I'm still hustling. Five years in, I don't have the steadiest stream of income, but by the grace of God my bills get paid. Five years in, my life is filled with uncertainty, but also adventure. Five years in, for all the things that have gone wrong, many more have gone right. Five years in, I'm genuinely happy.

I feel great about where I am. And I look forward to all the places I'm going. Because 5 years ago, I hadn't accomplished anything on the lists above. I was climbing from the ground floor, with no connections and nothing to build on. And now, starting today, I greet the rest of my life from a much higher step on the ladder. May the next five years be even bigger and better.

When I first got to town, my friend Kenzo told me that it takes five years in Los Angeles to feel like you're making any progress.

Cheers to five years.