Progression/Regression

Remember when I wrote my Grad School Resolutions? Well, now that I'm a semester in, I thought I'd check on my progress...


Resolutions for Grad School:

1. Take studying SERIOUSLY.
Studying here is WAY different than studying in undergrad was. For the most part, it doesn't exist. My homework assignments have to do with stretching, and my tests involve breathing and saying words. In some ways, it's a lot harder, because you can't rush through things (something that I would otherwise be likely to do). But I have been taking things seriously and doing my work. Except for tremoring every night at home. I don't. Because if I did, I think my body would be in a perpetual state of spasm (like I said, my homework is weird).
WIN

2. Finish homework, papers, reading assignments, etc. as quickly and efficiently as possible.
Heh. I think we all knew that this wasn't going to happen. I'm a born procrastinator. And I've successfully written all my papers within two days of their due dates. But you know what? They were all turned in on time. And they were all decent papers and assignments. So I'm just going to pat myself on the back for doing successful procrastination, and call it a day.
FAIL

3. Do not add negativity into the world of the school.
I won't say that I've been completely successful in this. What I will say, is that I am FAR more successful than most of my classmates. I go to school with some pretty negative people. And I am not one of them. So I count a win.
WIN

4. Be open-minded and willing to try all exercises in class, no matter how lame they seem or how stupid I might look doing them.
I am. And I do.
WIN

5. Do not gossip behind people’s backs.
This is just straight up impossible. But I think about it less as gossip, and more as venting. Or raising concerns. I don't talk about petty stuff. I talk about things like, "so-and-so is thinking of dropping out of the program," and "that guy was monopolizing class time with his agenda." I'm going to call it a different thing...
FAIL

6. Try not to dance during class. (Except for movement class, because I think we’re supposed to dance there sometimes. I just don't want my professors to think of me as "the one who dances in the middle of discussions.")
I only danced between classes. And sometimes in Movement class. I put it in the past tense because it seemed to make a couple of my classmates uncomfortable, so I've stopped (which, to be honest, I think had a negative effect on my mental health).
WIN

7. Remember that we all made it through an arduous process to get here, and we are all clearly talented, intelligent people. They deserve to be here, and so do I.
It wasn't always easy to remember this, but I tried to remind myself of it frequently.
WIN

8. Don’t let politics within the school get personal. Just because something is going on in class or in rehearsals, doesn’t mean it has to carry over into the rest of life.
We won't really get into politics until we start being cast in things. But some of my classmates are not successful in not letting classwork enter the personal realm. I'm pretty good at it, most of the time.
WIN

9. Try to make friends outside of the program.
WAY harder than it sounds. Aside from a couple of regulars at karaoke, I've failed. (by the way, The Engineer hasn't called me since before Thanksgiving. I left him a message a week ago which he never responded to. Oh well.)
FAIL

10. Go out and have fun at least once a month.
Month? Please. I have to do something at least once a week just to maintain my sanity. Which is exactly what karaoke is for.
WIN

11. Try to stay a vegetarian until at least the first week of November (which will have been a year... I've saved plenty of animals, and I want to eat meat so badly I can't even tell you).
SCORE! I rocked this one. And now that it's over, I'm like 18 kinds of happier.
WIN

12. Actually read all of the assigned reading. Don’t just skim it. Occasionally take notes.
We're allowed (nay; encouraged) to "read artistically" for some of our classes (no, I'm not kidding... those were my professor's exact words). I'm behind in my Acting reading, but it's not a huge deal. And I never read the final act of Anna Christie (but we only spent one day talking about it, so it didn't really matter... Maybe I'll read it over the summer.)
FAIL

13. Budget properly. If having trouble, begin writing down all expenditures.
I'm doing fine now. It was a battle at first because of how little I started off with, but I'm good at the moment.
WIN

14. Take all available opportunities to learn new skills.
Not yet applicable.
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15. Work on outside projects (such as student films) if they fit into schedule.
They haven't fit into my schedule yet.
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16. Take a trip to somewhere outside of town (even if it’s just to the next closest city) at least once a semester.
I went home for Thanksgiving. And a couple of days ago I was stressed out and talking to myself and ended up in a town I didn't know existed... but that's a story for another day.
WIN

17. Go to Disney World at least once.
Haven't done it yet. But I will. I swear.
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18. Have as close to perfect attendance as is physically possible.
I was about 4 minutes late to Movement class once, and 10 minutes late to Acting class once. But that's it. No missed classes yet. *knocks on wood*
WIN

19. Remember how hard it is to get to grad school. Remember how great of a program this is. Be grateful every, every minute.
I am grateful. Very, very grateful.
WIN

20. Find something to love about every class and every professor (so that I can focus on those things on the days that classes seriously blow).
I have. Many somethings, in fact. I like far more than I dislike.
WIN

21. Do not kiss anyone in the program (unless it's required by a scene or something).
I kissed a 3rd-year. Which I regret. But he's a really nice guy, and we're back to a normal conversational relationship now. I also regret kissing CCM, even though I thought he fit into a loophole by not being a student. He's at every social thing I'm at, and I'm still uncomfortable with the whole thing. (By the by, I've kissed three of my classmates in scenes.)
FAIL

22. Do not get crushed on anyone in the program.
So far, so good.
WIN

23. Do not actively flirt with anyone in the program.
I only do when drunk. Which is why I stopped getting drunk around them.
WIN

24. Do not pursue a relationship with anyone in the program.
Not a problem.
WIN

25. Keep all classmates on the “As Good As Gay” list.
Also not a problem.
WIN

26. Swear less.
Heh. I went totally backwards on this one. I think I actually swear MORE down here. Drat.
FAIL

27. Replace swear words with exclamations such as “drat”, “shoot”, “freakin’”, “frak” (← it’s a Battlestar Galactica term), and the like.
(HA! Typing that in my last one was not intentional) I do say "drat" and "frak". Alongside other swearwords... but still.
WIN

28. Cut alcohol out of diet (as much as possible).
I fell off of this one for a three weekends, but I've recommitted to not drinking. It's way better for my stability.
WIN

29. Try not to drink until my birthday (October 25 – If I can cut meat out of my diet for 9 months, I can certainly take out alcohol for 3).
Well, I ALMOST made it...
FAIL

30. Do not have alcohol more than twice in one week, regardless of occasion.
I did once. Which was the weekend that my classmate verbally attacked me for several hours... It was also my birthday weekend. And I haven't had alcohol since.
FAIL

31. Try to limit caffeine intake.
Done. I think I've had pop under 10 times this semester.
WIN

32. Make sure to eat tons of peanut butter, cheese, tofu, hummus, and other protein-containing foods in order to keep energy up.
Done. And now I'm trying to cut peanut butter and cheese OUT of my diet, as my Movement Professor says that they're making me gain weight (I'm replacing them with meat).
WIN

33. Don’t tell classmates about my (lack of a) sexual history. Remember that it is none of their business.
Whoops. That came out REALLY EARLY. Luckily, I'm not the only virgin in my program. Heck, I'm not even the only one in my class.
FAIL

34. Don’t even THINK about doing NaNoWriMo.
I'll admit it. I thought about it. But I quickly (as in, seconds later) thought the better of it. Hence, I'm still counting a win.
WIN

35. Try not to make the fact that I’m a blogger public knowledge. (Even though I’ve already warned my roommate. And one of the second years found my blog in February).
They all know.
FAIL

36. Consider lying and saying I blog about something that they won’t want to read. Make it sound like it’s not a personal blog.
Nope. They know what it is. And some of them want to read it.
FAIL

37. Do not discuss individuals from grad school program on my blog, in case they find it.
I totally have. Whoops. (I sort of forgot that I wrote this.)
FAIL

38. Do not mention what grad school program (or city) I’m in on my blog, so that they won’t be able to find it.
Check.
WIN

39. Be supportive of classmates, not competitive with them.
Check. Although I am occasionally jealous of their talent.
WIN

40. Avoid getting too negative about myself or my potential.
This is really freaking hard. But I'm better than I was.
FAIL

41. Use days off well, because they’re few and far between.
I don't. Unless by "well" I meant surfing Etsy for 5 hours at a time. Because I've definitely done that.
FAIL

42. Laugh as much as possible.
I do. :)
WIN

43. Write down all homework assignments (because I WILL forget them if I don’t).
I do. But for one of my classes, they're all in the syllabus, which is EVIL because I always forget to read it.
WIN

44. Walk or bike to school on occasion. (Will work out details on this once I figure out if it’s even safe to do this, as I’d have to cross a couple of 4-lane roads, and Florida drivers are NUTS.)
I walked to school once, and I never bought a bike. Walking to school sucked because it meant I had to leave for school earlier, and my body was already tired by the time I got to Movement class and had to do 5 minutes of jumping rope. I didn't like it.
FAIL

45. For understudy assignments, attend every rehearsal that fits into my schedule (there are only three actual understudy rehearsals per show, and we’re mostly expected to learn what to do by watching video tapes and whatnot… so clearly, the more actual rehearsals you can make it to, the better).
I didn't the last week of classes because I was too busy with class assignments, but now I'm going every day.
WIN

46. Work on completing my novel in my spare time (HA! Spare time! Like I'm going to have any of that!).
Nope. Haven't written a word since I got here.
FAIL

47. Remember to step back and take time to breathe.
I do.
WIN

48. Do whatever it takes to get closer to the goal of becoming a castable, skilled, professional actor.
I try.
WIN

49. Loosen up. (recommended by Eric Shonkwiler.)
Working on it.
WIN

50. Don't let things from OUTSIDE of class affect what's going on INSIDE of class. (The reverse of #8)
I SUCKED at this. But I'm getting better.
FAIL



By my count, that's 30 Wins, 17 Fails, and 3 N/A. And in my book that's pretty freaking good.


May you win more than you fail.

~A~