No Groove 4 Noder Daym

10. I have a green bra that I bought in Italy that is lucky for Notre Dame’s football team. Since 2004, it seems that every time I remember to wear it, Notre Dame wins. Seriously, my bra has a far better track record of predicting ND wins than any professional sports commentator. I get phone calls and text messages from people on every game day telling me to hunt it down and put it on (I went to Saint Mary's College, across the street from ND, so all my college friends are ND fans). There have only been a handful times when the magic of the bra did not work. One was the ND vs. USC game in 2005 (which Notre Dame arguably should have won… Technically, the clock ran out and they were ahead, but due to some questionable refereeing, they lost). Three other times have been bowl games, and I think they don’t count since it’s the post season. Besides, Notre Dame hasn’t won a bowl game since, like, 1996 or something. Anyway, I couldn’t find my green bra for most of this season, which is why Notre Dame has sucked. (Sorry, ND fans. My bad.) But I did wear it for the Navy game this weekend, which Notre Dame lost in double overtime. I guess they’re so tragically terrible this year that even the bra can’t help them. Either that, or the bra doesn’t work for overtime. And technically, I think I put it on after the game had already started, so that may have altered its potency.

11. Bad spelling/grammar is a deal-breaker for me. If a guy can’t tell the difference between “piece” and “peace”, or "your" and "you're", I’ll say goodbye. Obviously, we’re on two completely different planes, and we will never be happy together. Or, at least, I will never be happy with him. And he will probably never be happy because I’ll correct him every ten seconds.

12. If I had a theme song for my life, I think it would have to be “Groove Is in the Heart”, by Dee-Lite. I have groove in my heart. And in every other part of my body. Actually, now that I think about the lyrics, it might not be a good theme for me, because I would most certainly “dance for another”… I must rethink this. I’ll let you know if I come up with something.